E.T. is on TV tonight.

I saw E.T. in the movie theater when I was 6-and-something. I think I was the same age as Gertie. It was on vacation at my grandmother’s in Myrtle Beach, and it was pouring rain, so we went bowling and to a movie. I remember being sad for E.T. but not really understanding what was going on. I remember the Speak n’ Spell, the bicycles, drunk Elliot and the frogs and his first kiss with the blond girl.  And Mike, the older brother, who had a Walkman and cursed more than I thought I was allowed to see as a self-censoring 6-year old, and the scientist guy who helped Elliot and is now the voice of all the nature shows (Peter Coyote.)

It makes me sad that now, in 2012, when I Google E.T. Katy Perry is the first thing that comes up. UGH. You shouldn’t be able to manipulate/pay to alter history via internet search (and I’m in marketing!) . Who searches for E.T. thinking, “I really wanna hear that Katy Perry song”? That’s crap.

The only VHS tape I still own is E.T. My grandmother sent it to me for my birthday the year it came out “on tape.” It was the first movie I owned, and even thought I don’t have any way of playing the tape, I’m hanging on to it. And oddly enough, TWO of the few celebrity sightings in  my life involve Drew Barrymore (and the Apple Guy. )

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40 Days and 15 Minutes

 The 40 Days of Writing project is an idea put forth by an old friend who made a BRILLIANT decision to move far away to a magical land, fell in love with a Wine Guy with really cool glasses, and lives amongst some beautiful vineyards where she frolics in perpetually gorgeous, never-humid weather while drinking delicious wine at breakfast and playing bocce on the beach in her spare time. (That’s how I imagine it, anyway, Kate. Please don’t correct me if my depiction of your life is inaccurate.)

The challenge is to write something –anything – every day for 40 days. My dad always said the same thing about writing – you have to force yourself to sit down and commit to putting something on paper (or blog, as it were,) every single day, to be a writer. I don’t know what will come of this…I stopped the whole lent thing years ago, so, this is as spiritual I’m gonna get, at this point, as far as committing to something for 40 days.

I have a REALLY crappy, long, tedious, hellacious commute  and I often find myself killing time by practicing my 15 minutes of fame in the car. My 15 minutes are the result of my Oscar-Winning screenplay and Best Original Song. I go on every talk show, beginning with Jimmy Fallon, and signing off with David Letterman, where I bring my Dad (aka, Dave’s Biggest Fan,) and we do a whole banter-y extravaganza alongside Steve Martin. It’s awesome, and the genius part is that I’m never actually famous. I don’t want to write another screenplay or song after that, I just want to invest every penny and go give speeches on “Dreaming Big” and teaching young kids that “You Can Do Whatever You Set Your Mind To” and planting gardens in schools —  motivational stuff like that. Let’s put it this way, there would HAVE to be a “Where are they NOW?” segment to know what I was up to, because I won’t be on Dancing With the Stars.

Now, I realize this is all ridiculous and putting the cart in front of the horse’s great grand children, but it’s a long commute and I can’t write a screenplay in my car. (Or can I? Hmmmm…)  And, at this point, I have a fantastic soundtrack accompanied by an incredible cast of impeccably dressed, idiosyncratic actors, but if I end up at that podium, I will thank this project, that’s for damn sure. 

If you see me in my 12 year-old VW Golf on the Connector talking to myself (and maybe crying,) please don’t worry — I’m OK! I mean, relatively speaking. I’m just saying something annoyingly humble like, “Jimmy, this is all just SO surreal. I mean, I used to go to work every day practicing what we would talk about on your show, and now — now I’m ON your show. It’s just so crazy. And all I really want to do for my next 12 minutes of fame is to take over this stage with you and JT for some lyrical and satirical magic.” And then Jimmy cues Questlove, out comes Justin, Jimmy throws me a mic and BOOM. (It’s really not that bad having my long commute; I’m very active and productive.)

Since I have this dead-in-the-water blog I figured this was as good a place as any to try and write for 40 days. Welcome back, Mom, and hold on to your laptop. This is about to get crazy! I don’t know what that means and it’s probably not true at all, but I’m a little rusty and I sensed I needed to end this post.

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what should my starbucks name be?

i love starbucks, but i think it’s ridiculous that they have to write my name on the cup every time. it’s even more ridiculous that some of the cashiers feel a need to ask me how to spell my name. the cheery barista is likely going to mis-pronounce it anyway, so does it really matter if you spell it right? bill, behind me, is gettin’ antsy. just give me my latte. and let’s face it, it’s way more fun for me to let you come up with your own spelling, which is why i have an archive of starbucks cup photos, that i will now share. but waht should my starbucks name be? i’m thinking “jenny.”

i like to proclaim, "DELICIOSO!" upon receipt of my beverage. then i run out the door yelling, "There's so much MORE to EXPLORE!"

sometimes, i mix it up and get tea. sometimes, they spell my name with a T.

i don't even understand this.

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9 months in the making!

no, i’m not having a baby. don’t be silly. i lose my keys every other day, i couldn’t keep up with a small person. come ON.

check out my new bejeweled cardigan from Old Navy, though. it’s festive.

it's true! i got a new sweater!

it has been 9 months since my last confession–i mean post. one would think there might be pressure to post something really, really good, but my mom is the only person who ever reads this, and i’m sure she has forgotten where she saved the link…she’s more likely to ask when the baby is coming than when i’m going to post again on my blog. but, i’m in the mood. in the mood to write some stuff, that is. (sorry mom. or, more appropriately, sorry brian.)

so, i’ll be back soon with something hilarious or insightful. wait — i don’t want to oversell it. i’ll be back soon with something mildly interesting. for now, here’s something that makes me laugh out loud.

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GOYAIF!

(get off your ass! it’s friday)

lifted by lemonade. kinda reminds me of a carnival cruise commercial with the calypso-ness and the multicultural cast frollicking in the water. but in a good way.  

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GOYAIF (really, it’s saturday, but, whatev.)

true music.

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GOYAIF!

it’s COLD in the south! and this toe-tappin’ tune from vampire weekend’s forthcoming album makes me warm and fuzzy. and i like the word BALACLAVA. horchata

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